Location Scout: The Saint Louis Arch

Hello once again, LAN lovers! Pierre Laclede here, with our next LAN location scouting expedition! It all started when I asked Dudsmack why he had included an arch in many of the Laclede's LAN logos and pictures. It all made sense when we took a trip downtown, and ACE showed me this amazing sight:

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Incredible! Truly, it is a marvel of modern engineering! It towers over all the buildings, and it marks St. Louis as the Gateway to the West! Is it any wonder, then, that I immediately declared a LAN?


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The crew was reluctant at first, but after a little bit of sword brandishing I was able to convince them to make the climb up the enormous staircase to reach the ground upon which the monument stood.


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After quickly examining the Arch, Dudsmack said that there was really no way we could have a LAN on it, but we could probably have one under it. I agreed to this, and they immediately found a bench nearby and booted up their computers.


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Unfortunately, I could not configure the picture box to make my men look big while I was still looking at the Arch; the monument was just too massive. I immediately relocated the party to the green grasses beneath the structure.


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There, they were able to play "Strike Counter" or whatever it is they play in the bright sun, amidst the scenic downtown area of St. Louis and the wonderful park, full of flowers, trees, and tourists!


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Needless to say, after about five minutes of this, the LL boys were in critical condition from an overdose of sun and fresh air. Only sargentwolf seemed to be immune, except for the fact that he was babbling incoherently.


Review:

So, that (not counting the emergency room visit) wraps up another Laclede's LAN location scout! We can't really recommend the Arch, however. It simply does not deliver on some key areas:

Food:

Unless your eating habits closely resemble that of a cow, bison, or llama, you won't find much to eat under the Arch.

Cooling:

A breeze is good, but pollen and other "fresh air" surprises are not good for computers.

Space:

This is one thing that the Arch possesses a lot of - as you can see from the pictures, you will never find yourself at a loss for room here!

Atmosphere:

Quiet, outdoorsy calm. Terrible for a LAN.

Juice:

It appears that the lightning rod on top of the Arch cannot be rented out. Pity.

Yea:

VERY spacious, great scenery, fresh air.

Nay:

No power, too many people, outdoor environment bad for electronics. Fresh air.


Come again soon for our next location scout, as I try to find the perfect, untapped LAN oasis!